porkin’ the river

Take a can of Busch’s baked beans, specifically Busch’s beans, take the lid off the can and let It marinate in river water for exactly 15 minutes, if you have it in to short the beans don’t get enough river water in then and if you do it too long the beans simply float out of the can. After the 15 minutes you proceed to use the can of beans as a pocket pussy. If you are feeling bold instead of taking off the lid you can cut a hole in the top

“Hey bro what are you doing later”

“Nothing much just going to be porkin’ the river”

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