Pain and Suffering

What a man experiances when he's married. Only curable by getting divorced.

Example 1) Bob: Hey guess what?....Laura and I are getting married! Tom: What the fuck is wrong with you dumbass? Why the hell would you want all that Pain and Suffering? Kiss your life goodbye you fuckin tard.

Example 2) Laura: Bob asked me to marry him, and I said yes. As soon as the honeymoon is over, my pussy is off limits to him and I'm going to put that stupid motherfucker thru more Pain and Suffering that he could ever imagine. Then I'll divorce him and take all his fuckin money.

Example 3) Bob: Laura won't let me go out with you guys tonight. Tom: I told you too not marry that ball and chain you dipshit. How do like the pain and suffering?

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divorced

The best thing that could possibly happen to a married man, a blessing in disguise. It tends to be rather painful and expensive, but worth it in the end.

Example 1) I caught that fuckin tramp Laura cheating on me again. My lawyer says I should be divorced from that skanky slut in about 12 months.

Example 2) Bob and I are getting divorced. I'm going to assrape him so bad in court. His wallet will never be the same!

Example 3) Hi, I'm Laura, nice to meet you. I've only been married and divorced three times, my three kids all have different dads.

Example 4} I've had enough pain and suffering, I'm getting divorced.

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Is the fucking you're getting worth the fucking you're taking?

Is the amount of pussy you're getting from your old lady worth the amount of bullshit you have to endure from her?

Example 1) Tom: Laura's pissed at me for going to Hooters with you guys last week and has ragged on me about it for days. And I'm cut off too, I guess I'll have to jack off for awhile.
Bob: Is the fucking you're getting worth the fucking you're taking?

Example 2) Bob: Shirley's so pissed at me for not mowing the god damn lawn, that she won't give up any pussy! I'm so sick of her shit, what a fuckin nag. I think I'll go beat off in her purse.
Tom: Is the fucking you're getting worth the fucking you're taking?

Example 3) Tom: That fuckin bitch still won't fuck me, three weeks after we went to Hooters. I guess I'll go fuck that slutty Hooters waitress that gave me her number while I was staring at her bodacious boobs.
Bob: Is the fucking you're getting worth the fucking you're taking?

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Tub Turd

A piece of shit left floating in a motel hot tub by a white trash dirtbag with a loose asshole.

Gary refused to use the hot tub ever again after he heard someone had dropped a Tub Turd in it, and the tub wasn't properly cleaned and sanitized by the housekeeping staff at the Ramanda Inn in Coldwater, Michigan.

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married

A guy that is pussy whipped, hen-pecked, has no life, has no friends, and can't make any decisions without asking his bitches permission first.

Why the fuck did I ever get married to that frigid gold-digger cunt?

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Raghead Floss

The act of wiping yer ass on a motel owning raghead's rag (or towel) after receiving piss poor service there. This would be a follow-up to the classic "Curtain Floss".

The next time I went to the Super 8 in Columbus, I invented Raghead Floss when I ripped "Bob's" rag off of his head and wiped my ass with it when he tried to fuck me over (again) on my motel room bill.

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Raghead Floss

The act of wiping your ass on a motel owners head rag (or towel) after receiving piss poor service there. This would be a follow-up to the classic "Curtain Floss".

The next time we went to the Super 8 in Columbus, Raghead Floss was coined when I ripped "Bob's" rag off of his head and wiped my ass with it when he tried to fuck me over (again) on my motel room bill.

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