hairy log

When you shave your pubes over an unflushed toilet after meatloaf Monday and the hair sticks to the log making it a hairy little man or log in this case.

Husband: honey hey honey come look a this :)

Wife: gerald if you show me your hairy log one more time we’re divorcing.

Husband: :(

convincing shit

When the shit brew is convincing enough to make you think it’ll be quick and painless but turns out it was bluffing.

(2) When you’re convinced you have to shit but it’s just a stuck butt sneeze.

Jim: hey Larry, why were you in the bathroom for so long?

Larry: idk man I thought I was gonna get some relief, but as it turns out, that was one convincing shit.