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A retirement plan, of sorts, where an individual makes a bogus back injury claim and files for unemployment, social security, and/or insurance payments. This is a steady source of income for many dirtbags living in Alabama and Mississippi.
Mama, I'll be gettin' my own double wide 'cause my check's in the mail!--Alabama 401K in action!
233π 54π
A retirement plan, of sorts, for white trash people living in the South. Generally speaking a low-end wage earner will claim a back injury and go to an unscrupulous doctor who will assist in the claim of a debilitating health condition. Ultimately the participant in the Alabama 401K will receive a monthly check, tax free, so technically we could refer to this plan as a Redneck Roth IRA.
The recipients can usally be found hanging around Auto Zone trying to return a 10 year old starter from one of the many broken down Firebirds (aka trailer park Corvette) sprinkled in front of their God-forsaken turd shack of a house but don't understand that Auto Zone does not accept starters actually purchased at Advance Auto.
Some like-minded individuals will also participate in a Mama 401K. This is where the least successful of a mother's offspring returns to his birth home and mooches off said mother's social security check. On account of an unhealthy need for familiar approval, the mother freely allows the formerly errant son to have full reign of the double-wide mobile home. He may even make a half-hearted attempt to rebuild the transmission from his '77 Trans Am that he spray painted black and gold to look like Smokey's car as in "Smokey and the Bandit." He constantly claims to be looking for work when he is not reading the Auto Trader. Usually these people talk of an imaginary check that they will be receiving as a result of a settlement in a lawsuit filed against his employer after a fall from a roof some 6 years ago.
This individual can be seen at the local Wal-Mart, staring carefully and nervously at cold medicine boxes. Said indivual will usally have a bottle of acetone or Heet brand water remover in his cart and quite possibly a container or two of drain cleaner. Tonight he ain't fryin' catfish; he's gonna make a batch of shithouse meth. He will pay for the purchase by returning the Similac cans he "purchased" a week earlier using the WIC vouchers (sort of like food stamps for babies)intended for his numerous illegitimate half-wits.
Mama, did my check come in today? I need to by a three neck Pyrex boiler for the shed.
Alabama 401K--retirement plan for broke-ass rednecks who could not read the questions on the ASVAB which is a prerequisite to join the Alabama National Guard.
92π 29π
A trailer park Corvette is a late 1970's to early 1980's Pontiac Firebird or Chevrolet Camaro. These are the most undesirable years for these vehicles hence they make a very cheap addition even to a household with the most fincancial mismanagement, aka white trash welfare sponges. If these fine examples of American technology actually crank, they will typically run on 6 of 8 cylinders. Don't expect to find a catalytic convertor on these straight-piped beauties.
Billy Hutto just bought himself a 1982 'bird. It smokes like a crack whore at a Baptist convention and the title is questionable at best. He sure has a fine trailer park Corvette. It's a shame that his kids won't get to enjoy since DHR took them away. He seemed to think that Lucas motor oil treatment was more important than shoes for school.
153π 14π
Bama Jam is the equivalent to White Trash Woodstock. This festival in southeast Alabama brings together washed up country artists, Taylor Swift, and how that hell this happened---Kid Rock. This filthy mud pit concert attraction appeals to trailer park dwellors and Wal-Mart shoppers. The female attendants have tattoos on their fat ass cankles and the males are required to have goatees.
Fuck Me, I hate Bama Jam, I have never seen so much white trash in my life since Woodstock.
45π 10π
This new utterance reflects the current downturn in the economy. Budget-minded rappers and section 8 (government housing) celebrities will no longer throw out cash at the club shouting "Dolla Bills, Yo." Instead they will clip coupons from the Sunday paper and distribute them with much flair hence the expression, "Dolla Off Yo." This expression should not be confused with the Yiddish Wiggers of New York who have always bought Filas at the factory seconds outlet.
Phatty in da' club finds it hard to stack cheese since losing his job at Dodge. He savors the nights at da' club..."Dolla Off Yo."
41π 3π
eBayUI refers to the tendency of certain eBay members to drink large quantities of Pabst Blue Ribbon mixed with anti-depressants such as Lexapro and then go on a bidding frenzy. Very quickly mundane and useless items become the must have item of the year. After a brief black out period the individual then wonders how the hell he is going to pay for all of it.
What the hell I am going to do with 35 vacuum cleaner belts, a penis pump, and a King James Bible with Jesus' words in red? I must have been bidding whie eBayUI.
45π 5π
A black woman in a Volvo or Saab. This refers to the tendency of middle class African-American women in the Atlanta, Georgia area to buy mid-priced European sedans, particularly those from Sweden.
Lashontay is a Black Viking Princess, Swedish Chocolate in a chromed out Volvo S 60.
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