sober drunk

when someone has had no alcohol to drink but they act like they drank wayyy too much

billy was going crazy at the party last night, but he didn't drink anything! what a sober drunk.

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Cumcentration

The skill required to keep yourself from prematurely ejaculating when having sex with a significant other.

Steve: So I was fucking my main bitch last night, and I was pretty nervous and scared that I'd blow my load.
Alan: What'd you do?
Steve: I just thought about rainbows and shit.
Alan: Whoa that must've taken tons of cumcentration.

Sophie: I have this jewish boyfriend, and he keeps prematurely ejaculating.
Oprah: Bitch you gotta send your man to a cumcentration camp.
Sohpie: Oprah, that's very socially insensitive, I dont make fun of you for being a queefopotamus, do I?

76👍 2👎

dry-bumming

when a guy humps a girls butt without him or her having their clothes off. can also be done homo-sexualy.

jeff: "last night i was dry-bumming meleena all night long! it was insane!"
john: "wow but why didn't u guys just take your clothes off?"
jeff: "she didn't wanna have my dick up her ass"
john: "oh. i see.............."

49👍 16👎

Queefapotamus

1) A girl that is disgustingly overweight, a slut, and has a wide-set vagina.
2) A large proscious black girl who cums from the jungle.
3) A hippopotamus that queefs a bunch

Jeremy: Hey Mike, check out that slut whale over there. She must love fish dicks.
Mike: No way man, that chick is from the jungle, she's a fukin queefapotamus.
Jeremy: Werd.

Joel: Hey! That hippo queefs so much it should be called a Queefapotamus.
Mike: Joel, you say that every fucking time we're in the presence of hippos and women of african american descent.

84👍 18👎