stalking

when no just isn't enough

inmate 1: Why you here?
inmate 2: My girlfriend broke up with me so I followed her around for a year or so.
inmate 1: What did they charge you with?
inmate 2: stalking

549👍 280👎

walmart

1. the funnest place on earth
2. a place to go to beat your children

I love to go to Walmart and watch single mothers beat their children.

1723👍 486👎

geekmonster

an individual that would do anything for crack.

I just bought a brand new car from this geekmonster, $20 for a Mercedes, not bad.

34👍 5👎

Tyler Armstrong

The biggest pussyo

Look there’s Tyler Armstrong he’s going to get his 25 boys on us.

10👍 2👎

singapore swap

to put your wristwatch and wedding ring on a girls hand while she gives you a hand job therefore looking like you are doing it; a way to get around cheating on your spouse.

wife: you promise you didn't cheat on me on your business trip?
husband: yes, I promise.
(next day at work, after story is told around the office)
husband: no I don't feel bad, thank God for the singapore swap!

20👍 16👎

busted out tracktor tire

a gnarly pussy that looks like roast beef is dangling from

Most girls on sublime directory have pussys that look like blown out tractor tires.

25👍 19👎

black and decker pecker wrecker

a black prostitute with braces

Steve: What happened to your penis Jeff?
Jeff: I went to brown town last night to get some rock and wound up with a black and decker pecker wrecker.

13👍 20👎