Textarded

a) One who is retarded in the ways of modern texting, i.e not knowing the lingo, such as lmfao, lol, idk, etc.

b) One who does not know how to text at all.

Daughter: Idk, Mom, my bff Jill told me on me on the DL and I instantly lmfao.

Mom: *blank stare*

Daughter: You're so textarded, Mom.

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Humfrey Pants

A fictional character invented and put in the yearbook who has his own Myspace and Facebook accounts.

An obese teenage boy who is socially awkward and looks like his grandmother dresses him. Oftentimes, he lives with his grandmother, and his live revolves around her, even though she hates him.

Kid #1: You see that guy over there?
Kid #2: Yeah, I talked to him once. He's weird.
Kid #1: It looks like his grandma dresses him.
Kid #2: Duh, he's a Humfrey Pants.
Kid #1: Oh, that makes sense.

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