jesus suffering fuck

The most awesomely hardcore blasphemous thing you can say. Try to reserve this amazing phrase to times which require a little extra. Like when the earth explodes, or you wake up to find a 50ft high dildo standing over your girlfriend’s corpse quietly singing god save the queen.

Boss: You're fired. Oh and I fucked your wife and she died.
Miguel: Eh.
Boss: Wtf.
Miguel: My job and wife were boring me. Time to purge myself and move on.
Miguel (walking out yells over shoulder): Hey! By the way, that wasnt my wife. I put your wife in disguise.
Boss: JESUS SUFFERING FUCK!

53👍 41👎

asmol

Asthma medication. Famous because it sounds a lot like "asshole"

Doctor: Now do 4 puffs on your asmol a day.
Miguel: Wtf.
Doctor: Asmol, not asshole.
Miguel: Ahh.

12👍 6👎