Meaty

noun: meaty; plural noun: meaties

synonyms: uneducated, ignorant, unwoke, idiot, nOOb, superficial, douche, ultimate douche, omnivore, fuck-head, chode, madharchodh (India), zombie, lamer, schlemiel, asshat; assclown, loggerhead, mooncalf, troll

antonyms: genius, vegan, woke, conscious, mindful, considerate, conscientious, compassionate, empathetic, kind

COMMON MEATY CHARACTERISTICS
I. Stupid look of superiority
II. Found with "I love animals" t-shirt while eating a bacon double-cheeseburger (see number V.)
III. Believes that since some animals eat other animals, they too are justified, but unwilling to sniff another human’s ass or eat the offspring of a new partner
IV. Subscribes wholeheartedly to cherry picked interweb articles/arguments
V. Frequent non sequitur references to bacon and cheese, grunting ecstatically
VI. Confused by basic biological processes
VII. Habitually in the company of flat-earthers or climate-change deniers
VIII. Possesses I (heart) TRUMP memorabilia
IX. Breeds at alarming/unsustainable rate
X. Believes plants quietly feel pain but willing to ignore cries of a dying animal
XI. Selfish unquestioning of practices, from which, they directly benefit (not unlike politicians)
XII. Subscribes to ridiculous arguments: animals are stupid; it’s legal; it’s humane/kosher/halal/grass-fed/free-range; circle of life; our ancestors ate meat; Hitler was a vegetarian; but protein, bro; B12; god; electrolytes

FORMAL
The greedy meaty who entered the vegan co-op restaurant made a scene when the staff refused to kill an animal on their behalf.

This year alone, meaties have killed more than 200 animals each.

INFORMAL
a person who eats meat; an ignorant person

ARCHAIC
a person of low intelligence.

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