rabies

annoying little kids who insist on being loud and spewing disgusting fluids i.e. tears, spit, snot, vomit, urine, diarrhea.

John: So did you like that new batman flick?

Jack: I don't know. Some Twat with at least 7 rabies decided to sit in front of us.

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Viking Hammer

A contraceptive method dating back to the Vikings.

When having sex with a wench who is unsuitable to bear his children, the Viking pulls out and ejaculates on his knuckles then proceeds to punch the wench in the face.

Mike: so what happened with that chick you took home?

Mark: oh not much...we had sex for a while, but i was too lazy to put a condom on, so I ended up just giving her the old viking hammer...

Mike: Pow! Right in the kisser!

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