John

john is someone unlucky enough to not be named jack and will always try and be called jack

Person 1: hey john

John: it’s jack

Person 1: your just a fake jack.
John: my name is jack

Person 1: bitchboy

Kienbaum

Wonderful dude who is my bff and is fun to be around with a mysterious man

Whoa is that your friend

Yeah he’s kienbaum

Whatttt
Yeah I’ll fuck you up he’s my bff