Getting Horsey

To 'get horsey' is to take ketamine

"We getting horsey tonight mate?"

"Again? I dunno man, I keep losing my shoes and I've only got this pair left."

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Robert Downey Juniored

When someone is wasted to the point that they are indiscriminately unloading their weapon on a busy street, they are Robert Downy Juniored

"The fuck's that noise?"

"It's this guy outside, he's Robert Downey Juniored!"

"It's Robert Downey Jr?" Ted asked, having misheard over the drunken gunfire. "I gotta go get his autograph!"

"No!" Billy screamed over the hail of gunfire that met his friend. "No!"

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Trick of the Thai

Mistaking a male Thai prostitute for a female one can be called a 'trick of the thai' due to how ladylike many of them look. It's usually an excuse made by men who were out shopping for some ladyboy action, got caught getting it and then didn't want to admit to it after. Because why would they not just check up front if they didn't want it? It's not like we don't know that they're out there. Lurking.

"Whoa, hey Stan, this girls got balls!"

"Wha...err...oh, no way. Total trick of the thai man, I well thought it was a girl. Honest."

"Hmm."

"Yeah...can I have five minutes to finish off?"

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The Pregnancy Craving Shield

When pregnant women eat junk food with no positive nutritional qualities and claim that it's a craving, they're using the pregnancy craving shield.

"Could you go out and get me another two bags of chips? And a deep fried pizza slice?"

"Really?"

"I'M CRAVING IT!"

"Jesus, put the pregnancy craving shield down already. I'll get it for you. Just stop looking at me like I'm a man-sized chicken leg."

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Quack Echo

When a person who has just recieved pay-off anal sex goes into the bathroom afterwards to freshen up, the noise that they produce as they sit down on the toilet and fart out depraviar is known as a quack echo.

"Whoa! You just hear that quack echo? Leanne must have got lucky!"

"Err, no, i'm in here," shouts Leanne from the kitchen.

"Fuck! It must have been Albert then! That sly old dog."

"Oh yeah, he loves it. And i've got a silencer anyway," explains Leanne, "so you wouldn't hear a quack echo of that magnitude from me."

"A silencer eh? I just do mine in the shower to drown out the noise."

"Classy."

"Oh yeah. Very."

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Sand Crabbing

Sidling crab-like whilst simultaneously making a high pitched, "w00p w00p w00p w00p," noise.

"Did you see Zoidberg sand crabbing on Futurama last night?"

"No, I had to slay that dragon-witch didn't I."

"Dragon-witch?"

"It's a dragon with the powers of a witch. Or it was anyway. Now it's just 18 tonnes of value to premium grade dog food."

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One Eyed Bandit

A type of live action gambling that can be undertaken in Thailand. First of all the gambler must select three Thai hookers and take them back to his room. The gambler then asks them to reveal their genitals, one by one. Like with a one armed bandit (English word for slot machine), the way to win is to get three cherries in a row. Any less than three cherries and you're BUST

"I wish they had some one armed bandit machines out here."

"We could just play one eyed bandit?"

"Hmm, yeah. Or Thai roulette maybe?"

"Either or man, I just need to unload quickly before my balls get any heavier. I feel like I'm lugging around a couple of coconuts in a 50g peanut bag."

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