helicopter kid

A child who is simply not ready for the harsh realities of real life because they were coddled too much as a child. Helicopter kids come in many forms and do many things to signify that they are indeed, helicopter kids. For example:

Follow you around the room when having a conversation

Eat out a lot despite not having a job

Cant live in a house without a heater

Ask for permission to do mundane shit

Gets paranoid as shit whenever anything slightly illegal happens in their vicinity

Overall a beta human being

“Should we invite ___ over tonight?”

“Dude no, they’re such a ducking helicopter kid, they’ll ruin everyone’s night.”

Goonism

The religion of doing hood ass goon shit. Usually kinda illegal things.

Adherents to the religion are broke as shit and generally live on that rice n beans diet.

Church service is walking around town because you’re broke and have nothing to do. If you adhere to this religion, you probably spend any left over money on juice, weed, graffiti supplies and or things for your skateboard.

“Dude why didn’t Chris text me back”

“Idk man he’s probably out skating, getting drunk, eating tendies, you know, goonism shit.”

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