kurtsexual

A kurtsexual is someone who is neither homosexual nor hetrosexual, as they do not like anyone else apart from Nirvana's lead singer, Kurt Cobain, despite him being dead. Kurtsexuals are usually 13 year old boys who have covered their room with posters of Kurt, done drugs or desire to take heroin to be like Kurt, tried to shoot themselves in the head with a shotgun, bought all his signed stuff off eBay, and want to go visit his grave sometime.

Dean : "Hey man, this girl wants to have anal with you on Friday night"

Jack: Nahh, I'm only interested in Kurt. i'm a kurtsexual. MM fuck yeah, Kurt Cobain :P

* masturbates whilst lookingg at lifesize poster of Kurt Cobain and making orgasmic noises*

Dean: Mmm you need to get a life. Kurt's dead

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The Pie Chart

The Pie chart is a way of referring to the different stages of sex by using code names. It is similar to the baseball system, although instead it uses different pies as different stages of sex. It was first invented by a group of teenagers who came from Wigan, and is now used internationally. It is especially common in Britain.

First Pie (Sometimes referred to as chicken pie): French Kissing.
Second Pie (Sometimes referred to as meat and potato pie) : Stimulation of the genitals. (Fingering, Hand Jobs, etc).
Third Pie (Sometimes referred to as steak and kidney pie) : Oral sex
Fourth Pie (Sometimes referred to as Creme Brulee, Strawberry Souffle, or other types of extravagent desert : Sexual intercourse
If someone is suggesting that a person present has had sexual intercourse, they may shout out "Who ate all the pies?" If a person responds with "I did," "I ate all the pies," or something similar, then they are stating that they have had sexual intercourse.

Other code names are used for other things that are sex related are involved in the pie chart. These include:

Food Poisioning : A code word for STI's
Indigestion : A code word for pregnancy
Packaging : A code word for condoms

(Example of the pie chart being used in an everday conversation)

Mike: "I am going to eat creme brulee tonight,"

Josh: "Make sure you leave the packaging on and don't rush into it. Otherwise, you could end up with severe indigestion!"

Mike: "Hmm.. maybe it's easier to just eat steak and kidney pie."

Josh: "Nahh.. that pie can taste unusual!"

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