Mitch Hedberg

Seeing Mitch perform live (about a year before he died) was the best moment of my life. All of you are right: He's the funniest person that ever lived, and the world is much less funny without him.

Mitch Hedberg -isms:

"Escalators are good, cuz they can never break. They just become stairs."

"I find that a duck's opinion of me is heavily influenced by whether or not I have bread."

"I saw a human pyramid once. It was so unnecessary."

"I wish there was such a thing as cinnamon roll incense, because I would light some up in the morning and give my roommate false hope."

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