Jonathan

Jonathans are massive Geeks, let there be no doubt. They take nerd to the next level, and are stupidly good at maths. Jonathans look like normal men & try their best to act like normal men, but are quite extraordinary.

Jonathans have a large fan base & are loved by men and women alike because of their personable approach. Even when Jonathan jokes are utterly rubbish, people find them hilarious & can’t get enough of them. A Jonathans fan base is a sickening sight to behold.

Jonathans can be self critical & are not very kind to themselves. They do not enjoy social situations, despite coming across very confident & skilled at managing them. Jonathans like to fix things & feel good when they make a positive difference to people’s lives. They don’t like praise & will avoid it at all costs.
But Jonathans come with a health warning. They can ruin your day in a second flat. Brutal digs, unfunny jokes, deliberate wind-ups, savage put- downs & an unrivalled ability to ignore messages - a Jonathan can make you feel like absolute psycho for merely existing. You need to have a whole heap of self confidence to be able to tolerate time with a Jonathan because he will exacerbate your worst fears with ease in the name of humour.

Jonathans are frustratingly short in their communication & will often leave people wondering wtf they mean. It is very difficult to know when Jonathans are being serious or joking.

A: “Who is leading the meeting later?”
B: “idk but I hope it’s a Jonathan, I need some rubbish jokes in my life”

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