wanking with dinosaurs

BBC TV show (yet unaired) about the masturbatory customs of Tyrannosaurus Sex, Orgasmosaurus Ferox and other Mezozoic critters.

Did you know that little Velociraptors got off by humping the leg of giant sauropods?
Did you know that Microraptor Zhaoianus had a feathered dork?
If you didn't, then watch Wanking With Dinosaurs!

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Tweak

To give a girl's clit a real workout, I mean, like when you give it the rub-a-dub taking it between your thumb and index. Not to be confused with mere twiddle.

I was giving her a real tweaking when her mother walked in on us.

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lewinsky

Common name employed by forensic experts for the ultraviolet lamps used to spot semen stains on fabric.

Pass me the lewinsky, Scully... this sure looks like extraterrestrial spunk

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hair pie

(noun)Cullinary metaphor for female genitalia. Applies only if it is suitably hirsute.

"Love to eat hair pie, but I hate to pick all those hairs from my teeth"

D.H. Lawrence in Lady Chatterley's Lover: "But his silence was fathomless. His hands held her like flowers, so still and strange. "Where are you?" she whispered to him. "Where are you? Speak to me! Say something to me!"

He raised his head from her hair pie, murmuring: "Ay, my lass!"

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puffies

Said of female nipples that stand out notably.
This is not your usual nipple reacting to cold, but a fat, turgid, pointy, fearless, suck-till-you-drop nipple.

She's got no tits, but she's got an awesome set of puffies!

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shitzel

A weird little convoluted turd. Very hard to accomplish.

Hey, look kids! I plopped a shitzel!

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Xanadu

One of the 10 worst movies in History.

I realized that Olivia's ass was way too flat.

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