Baseball

a sport where people play to impress your girlfriend

josh: you want to win the baseball game tonight?
Jerry: I hope so my girlfriend Jessica said if we won she’d bang me, if we lose we break up.
Josh: good luck making a baby then.

Mom

The most strictest parent around when your on a date she goes with u

I’m going on a date with u oh ok my mom is going

Umpire

A person who fucks a team over a bad call.

Bottom of ninth two out runner at 3rd score 4-3 away team. Batters up 2-2 count ball right down the middle “BALL” the pitcher yelling at umpire for that. Another example, 2-2 count game on the line batter sees a pitch in the dirt. Umpire “STRIKE THREE YOUR OUT” why umpires are the worst part of baseball