twatwank

A twatwank is much the same as a titwank, except it utilises a lady's tuppy. Essentially, it's just plain old sexing.

"My, Lady Chatterley, I wouldn't half love to give you a good twatwank up against that old oak tree yonder..."

"The twins, Alan and Victoria, slipped into the train's toilet with a view to steal a quick kiss from one another. As it turned out, Alan ended up furiously twatwanking Victoria up against the door."

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ass wazz

The art of curling one out of one's back passage. An Ass Wazz is essentially taking a dump, simply put in an infinitely more eloquent fashion.

"I shall retire to the lavatory for a sumptuous ass wazz."

"Joyce expelled an almighty ass wazz across Nigel's face. Some went in his eyes."

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glatz

is short for 'glatzkopf' - the German word to describe somebody as bald. Used by English-speakers so as to codify someone's baldness with a view to discussing it openly in front of them. See 'beglatzed'.

Jeff: "Have you seen Cody's bald head? What a loser."
Brian: "Oh, hey Cody!"
Cody: "Hi guys."
Brian: "You're right Jeff - a definite glatz."

"Sheila splashed her wetness right across Barry's glatz"

Gay Steve was dying to spaff all over Bald Tony's glatz.

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