you're the king

A thinly veiled insult. Short for "I hereby crown the king of dumbasses"

Nurse: "How exactly did this injury occur?"

Patient: "I skateboarded off the roof of my house and meant to land on the trampoline, but I ended up crashing into the shed instead"

Nurse: "You're the king"

4👍 2👎

Autisdick

A person on the autism spectrum (usually fairly high-functioning) who uses their condition as an excuse to act like a dick toward literally everyone that crosses their path

Person #1: "OUT OF MY WAY, MORON!"
Person #2: "What the fuck is your problem, man?"
Person #1: "Hey! Don't yell at me, I'm autistic!"
Person #2: "You're an autisdick!"

14👍 15👎

Shrimp Boats is a-Comin'

1. When a girl who smells like marine life "down under" achieves orgasm

2. A song written in 1951 by Paul Howard Weston and sung by Jo Stafford (can be sung whenever a girl who smells like marine life achieves orgasm)

*when going down on a chick who smells like marine life down below*

Her: "I'm coming! I'm coming!"

You: "Oooooooooooooh.... Shrimp Boats is a-Comin' their sails are in sight! Shrimp Boats is a-Comin' there's dancin' tonight!"

4👍 1👎

Swallowed a bouncy house

a) When a girl's breasts grow suddenly and quickly, especially early in puberty
b) When a woman gets a boob job

Is it true that Chesty Sunnyjugs got her boobs at age 11?
You kidding me?! She swallowed a bouncy house!