The customer is always right

A maxim in the retail industry wherein a customer is first priority. The sentence is a logical fallacy because it never assumes that a customer can lie, (They do. A lot.) have unrealistic expectations, (They do. A lot.) make ridiculous demands, (They do. A lot.) or even flat-out abuse the staff member in question just because. (They... Well, you get the idea.) As a result, this mindset has led to many, many, MANY instances of customers acting like entitled jackasses because they think it will get them what they want.

"The customer is always right?" More like, "The customer is usually a moron and an asshole."

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mummy

The reason I don't screw with pyramids.

DO NOT ENTER THE PYRAMID, OR FACE THE CURSE OF THE MUMMY!

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lego

The bane of your foot's existence.

Mark: Hey, did you hear about what happened to Jody?

Pete: No, what?
Mark: He stepped on a Lego. He might need to get his foot amputated.
Pete: Over a piece of plastic? Damn.

English

The official language of the country of What.

What ain't no country I ever heard of! They speak English in what!?

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BT punch

Literally a flying fist punch to the face from a Boiler Technician. Used as a welcome-in joke used on n00b soldiers in the navy.

First day on the job, huh? Could you go get a BT punch from the engine room?

Personal Finance

That class that teaches you how to do taxes and stuff, yet nobody takes it and then go on to complain about how school doesn't teach you about life.

Lars: School ain't teach you sh*t bout life.
Ken: See, if you took your personal finance classes, you wouldn't be saying that.
Lars:*facepalm* I'm an idiot...

February 30th

See rejection

Sandra: OH MAH GAWD!!
Macy: What is it?
Sandra: I just asked Kendall out! We have a date on February 30th!
Macy: *facepalm*

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