Medusa pouch

(noun) a beer-carrying pouch which is created by taking the shirt off of your back, laying it flat on the ground, placing beers onto the flat shirt, then tying the lower corners and shirt sleeves to each other so that the beers cannot fall out. It is so named because when carried, to a drunk, it may appear that one is carrying the head of the snake-laden Medusa of lore.

I have all of this beer and n container to transport it. All I have are my personal possessions, my body, and a very resourceful intellect. Eureka! I'll use my shirt to rig up and Medusa pouch.