101 Damnations

Exclamation used to express exasperation or disgust.

"I can't get this computer to boot up properly! 101 Damnations!"

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rent-a-Clouseau

A security guard who falsely accuses somebody of malfeasance or wrongdoing and stubbornly defends this assumption.

I'm banned from that Safeway because the rent-a-Clouseau thinks I'm a shoplifter.

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