Shatsturbating

The act of pooping, whilst, simultaneously, masturbating. This act is best accomplished on a toilet, or toilet-esque surface.

"I ate a lot of beans, and then I shatsturbated!"

Larry: "Wow, Turner, what's that smell coming from the bathroom? It smells of quando and poopy."
Turner: "Don't blame a brothah for shatsturbating. It's natchrill."

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Bizarro Pooping

It's when you put poop IN your butt

Tom: "Hey where'd all my shit go?"
Larry: "Meryl was bizarro pooping again!"
Tom: "Merrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyl!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"I liked the poop so much, I bizarro pooped right back up dere!"

The toilet wouldn't flush after I pooped, so I had to bizarro poop it, so no one would know about my horrible problem!

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Poodanking

The act of pooping into the urethra of your penis, and then peeing out the poop as though it were a more viscous peepee. Poodanking is a solo act, involving the penis and pooper of a single poodanker.

Note: Poodanking is not a town in China.

I'll never poodank again!

Jenny (on phone): "What are you doing right now?"
Ted (on other end of phone): "Nothing."
Jenny: No, come on sugarbunny. Tell me what you are doing."
Ted: I...uh... how do I phrase this? I... uh... I'm shitting into my penis! And then releasing the sweet nectar as though it were urine of my own!"
Jenny: "Come again, Ted?"
Ted: "Jenny, I'm POODANKING!!!"
Jenny: *dialtone*........

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