Stalinity

A non-scientific measure of the level of staleness of a food item. Usually used when referring to stale candies such as sour keys and wine gums.

The test is comprised of wiggling (or squeezing if it is too small to be effectively wiggled) the item between the thumb and the forefinger and observing its stiffness relative to it's stiffness in its fresh state. The greater the deviation in this comparison, the greater it's degree of stalinity.

These candies are always best stale. Leave the bag of them open for the night and check their stalinity in the morning. If they are good and stale we will eat them then!

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