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Cougar Milk

Cougar Milk is a beverage used by cougars, with other cougars, as a social drink to dull the senses. Cougar Milk is often a gin & tonic, white wine, or Cosmo.

Cougar Milk is available at country clubs, tennis clubs, five star hotels and truck stops in Nevada. Women under the age of 39 should avoid Cougar Milk until they have developed a serious drinking problem. Cougar Milk should not be consumed until after 9:30 AM. Please use caution when operating a dildo or other sexual device after using Cougar Milk. In some cases, cougars reported an uncontrollable need to shop after drinking large quantities of Cougar Milk. Luxury auto dealerships and high-end jewelry stores should be avoided while using Cougar Milk unless otherwise directed by your divorce attorney.

After knocking back Cougar Milk all morning, the cougars went to the day spa and spent the afternoon complaining about their lovers.

by Jib Slice May 22, 2010

73πŸ‘ 9πŸ‘Ž


turtled em

When a skier or snowboarder is hiking the boot pack or traversing a ski slope while wearing a backpack and the person behind them pushes the off into the deep snow.

I Turtled em into the powder and the poor bastard was left there floundering with his arms and legs flailing like a turtle on his back.

Jason pushed that dude off the boot pack and turtled em into 3' feet of fresh pow.

by Jib Slice May 13, 2010

41πŸ‘ 3πŸ‘Ž


face-shots

When riding deep powder, (snow) and it comes up and hits ya in the face, yer getting face-shots. A powder riders epic, dream day. Like heroin, face-shots are better than sex...

Dude, it was totally blower out there. I was catching face-shots all over the mountain.

by Jib Slice January 12, 2011

44πŸ‘ 30πŸ‘Ž


park & pipe rats

Park & Pipe Rats are persons who spend their days skiing and riding the Park and Pipe features at a ski resort and waste precious lift line space for real skiers and snow riders.

Park & Pipe Rats speak the language of dude-speak and are known for their dude-tude attitude towards the general skiing and snowboarding public.

Easily spotted by their tall tee's, pants hanging half-way off their asses and Bruno style hair cuts, male Park & Pipe Rats are dangerous to both young women and cougars alike.

Jib Slice and the rest of his Park & Pipe Rats buddies have poached more cougars at this ski hill than the ski instructors.

Those Park & Pipe Rats look like they shop at the Big and Tall store. All upper body and really short legs. That's what makes them so good at cougar hunting, I guess?!?

by Jib Slice May 13, 2010

45πŸ‘ 8πŸ‘Ž


lay'n trench

Skiers and snowboarders who are carving turns down a ski hill are known to be "lay'n trench", because of the deep ruts left in the snow.

Dude asks, "Hey man, are ya making pow turns today?"

Bro replies, "No Dude, the snow ain't deep enough out there. I'm gonna go hit the groomers. Today's the day to be out there lay'n trench!"

by Jib Slice January 12, 2011

19πŸ‘ 3πŸ‘Ž


Sit on my Facebook

Phrase/term: the act of becoming a "Friend" or "Fan" of a person or entity on Facebook. A invitation/phrase used by Jib Slice to invite new Friends to his Facebook page.

Dude, become my "Friend" and I'll let ya sit on my Facebook.

by Jib Slice May 11, 2010

60πŸ‘ 11πŸ‘Ž


hang angle

Hang angle of a dude's hang dangle is important for comfortable sitting, kneeling and effective cougar hunting. A Jibber or park rat can lose his hang dangle if the hang angle ain't right while riding in the park and pipe.

Hold on there dude, I gotta adjust the hang angle of my hang dangle to bust that move.

by Jib Slice May 21, 2010

40πŸ‘ 2πŸ‘Ž