Foster's floppy

Inability to achieve or maintain an erection due to excessive alcohol consumption; whiskey dick. (in reference to Foster's Lager.)

The bunch of us got fucking ripped at a bar last night, and after we went home, I tried to throw it into Nancy, but I couldn't. Foster's floppy.

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the change

Cessation of menstruation; menopause. (First popularized on the 1970s sitcom 'All in the Family'.)

A. My wife is having hot flashes. I think she's going through "the change".
B. Shit dude, after your wife goes through "the change", you can jizz in her all you want.

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make an evening of it

To masturbate; esp. of a female, and usually in a bathtub. (Originally in reference to the amount of time required to prepare for female masturbation, such as drawing a bath, lighting candles and incense, etc.)

A: "I'm going to 'make an evening of it tonight'."
B: "Don't forget to wash the yellow ring off from around the tub afterwards."

hand fruit

Any fruit that is normally eaten by holding it whole in one's hand (e.g. apples, bananas, etc.)

Fruits that are only palm-able by giants or people with hand deformities (and palm-able things that are not fruits) don't count.

A: Is a casaba a hand fruit?
B: Only if you're Andre the Giant.

A: Excuse me, could you direct me to the Hand Fruit section?
B: The what?

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