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St. Louis

The Greater St. Louis Area is the only urbanized area in the state of Missouri. (NOT MIZ-UR-AH!) There are NO farms in the area short of the tourist-y places like Grant's Farm, but even that is at least a fifteen min. drive from the city. Essentially, the entire Jewish population of Missouri lives in the suburbs of St. Louis and surrounding areas like University City,(aka U City, or Jew City.) Once you are half and hour's drive from St. Louis, the trailers get bigger, the trucks get bigger, and the people get bigger, and congratulations, you're officially in MIZ-UR-AH, the redneck part of the state.

You Know You're From Miz-ur-ah When...
-Everyone in your family has been on a "Float trip."
-"Vacation" means driving to Silver Dollar City, Worlds of Fun or Six Flags.
-Down south to you means Arkansas.
-The phrase, "I'm going to the Lake this weekend," can mean only one thing.
-You know what "Party Cove" is.
-You think Missouri is pronounced with an "ah" at the end.
-You know in your heart that Mizzou can beat Nebraska in football.
-You think I-44 is spelled "foarty-foar." (St. Louis Only)
-You'll pay for your kids to go to college unless they want to go to KU.
-You know that Concordia is halfway between Kansas City and Columbia, and Columbia is halfway between St. Louis and Kansas City, and Warrenton outlet mall is halfway between Columbia and St. Louis.
-You can't think of anything better than sitting on the porch in the middle of the summer during a thunderstorm.
-You know that Harry S. Truman, Walt Disney and Mark Twain are all from Missouri.
-You know what "cow tipping" or "Possum Kicking" is.
-You think "frog gigging" should be an Olympic sport.
-You think Imo's is larger than Pizza Hut.
-You can tell the difference between a horse and a cow from a distance.
-You don't put too much effort into hairstyles due to wind and weather.
-There's a tornado warning and the whole town is outside watching for it.
-The local gas station sells live bait.
-Little smokies are something you serve on special occasions.
-All your radio preset buttons are country.
-You know enough to get your driving done early on Sundays before the Sunday drivers come out.
-You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Missouri.

by Jo Sky August 13, 2006

380👍 189👎


St. Louis

St. Louis
The Greater St. Louis Area is the only urbanized area in the state of Missouri. (NOT MIZ-UR-AH!) There are NO farms in the area short of the tourist-y places like Grant's Farm, but even that is at least a fifteen min. drive from the city. Essentially, the entire Jewish population of Missouri lives in the suburbs of St. Louis and surrounding areas like University City,(aka U City, or Jew City.) Once you are half and hour's drive from St. Louis, the trailers get bigger, the trucks get bigger, and the people get bigger, and congratulations, you're officially in MIZ-UR-AH, the redneck part of the state.

Stupid St. Louis Laws
-It's illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket. This law refers back to the extinct Italian celebration, Hill Day, when beer was served in buckets.
-A milk man may not run while on duty.

by Jo Sky August 14, 2006

74👍 89👎