strangle a midget

Another way of saying you have to poop or take a shit

Q: Where is Dave? A: He just ate ten tacos. He had to go strangle a midget.

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wind biscuit

When you fart and it sounds like a wisp of air.

Dave let fly a little wind biscuit.

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coffee stains

The stains left in your underwear after unleashing a wet fart

The bean soup I ate for lunch gave me coffee stains.

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fifty cent cigar

When you have to shit so bad that a turd the size of a fifty cent cigar starts to come out of your ass. Similar to shart

As Dave walked home, the cheap beer kicked in. He was forced to hobble home with a fifty cent cigar hanging out of his ass.

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dirty turd

The dirty turd is when you shit out only one turd but have to wipe your ass so much you use most of the toilet paper (if not all of it). That is why it is called the dirty turd.

Dave used a whole roll of toilet paper and his left sock after he pooped out that dirty turd.

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