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A mythical monster that is said to creep into a room at night and blows his hot milky load all over the unsuspecting victim's hair and clothing.
"I am a jizzmonster"
The thing that looks like a face when you stand in front of a mirror and bend over while looking at your ass from behind yesterday for the first time.
"look at my perennium"
A monkey that can be used to replace actual human contact while at the same time never complains when you ignore them.
"I have a bunch of lovemonkeys"