Gurting

The act of tying a living child to a weight bench, and sitting on their face with a bare bottom while doing extensive weight workouts. A partner then starts shoving paintings up its ass and saves it for munting it when it suffocates.

Tim: “I got a kid in the back of my van, let’s go gurting!”
John: “Hell yeah let me grab my rope and bench, so we can later workout on it and shove paintings up it’s ass!”
Tim: “I can’t wait to munt them!”