when getting your partner from behind, you secretly get a sharp object of some sort and make a decent sized wound on the upper thigh and then proceed to finger the wound.
helen: what are those wounds all over your thighs?
gladys: oh, those are trap doors
9👍 62👎
when getting your female partner from behind, you pull out and spit on her back giving the illusion that you just "came" on her back, and when she turns around...BAM, you shoot your load in her face.
i totally pump faked my lady last night...but sadly it hit her in the eye...and now she is a cyclops
332👍 141👎
after completing that famous "chilli dog", the man and woman both enjoy a feast of your leftovers. (leftovers being the shitty mess on the woman's chest)
woman: wow i sure and hungry, wanna go out to sizzlers?
man: no i'm ok, i am still full from when we cleaned the plate. but it is a nice gesture though...
4👍 18👎