shnext

to snap chat while shitting

I sat down and sent a shnext, and felt a profound sense of being efficient. Just as my body had been cleansed form the toxins of last night's bourbon and aged cheese, the world of information was only briefly subject to my writing.

Archisext

A sexting architect.

Johnny sat down, pulled out his phone, took a picture of his dong , and began archisexting. He liked golfing with the guys, but not as much as much as he liked the thought of Lloyd Wright's stained glass and pussy.

24👍 1👎

Karl Jan

Foxy Flemish fighter pilot.

RPE: "That Karl Jan guy seems nice."
TL: "Super cool guy. Just like his brother, but take away the asshole factor."

Metamucil Mule

1 tbsp metamucil
3 oz Costco vodka
2 oz water

Johnny knew it all too well. When he travelled, dry ass-brownies would slowly form. He would soon become excrementally challenged. He turned to a friend who, in turn, prescribed a Metamucil Mule.

schmerzvergnugen

to experience pain and pleasure simultaneously

I walked the lonely streets of the exchange. I came upon a statue of two bucks mating. The front buck expressed a look of unprecedented pleasure. But a closer view revealed a whisper of pain. As both an amateur and a virgin of art interpretation I concluded the buck was in a state of schmerzvergnugen.

Camel Toeni

1 oz vermouth
1 oz gin
1 oz Campari

1 camel crush cigarette.

Instructions:
Mix the aforementioned over ice
Hike the shorts
Crush the camel

Light the camel

Cover with a glass bowl for 210 seconds

The taste of good. And the taste of bad. All at the same time. Tickle the hood and crush the camel. Let’s indulge in a Camel Toeni.