Etymology:
I first heard the word "merp" in April 1984 when I started a new job. A fellow named Irwin Arnstein, one of the more unique computer programmers on the team, used it instead of "Hi. How you doing?" the very first time I passed him in the hallway, I stopped and asked what he meant and he explained it was a word he used when he passed someone, wanted to be polite and acknowledge their presence but didn't actually want to engage in a conversation about how their day or life was going. I got the impression from Irwin and other people in the office that he had made up the word some time earlier,
A few years later a short section of concrete sidewalk was poured near my office. Late that night I was one of the last people to leave the office and saw the cement was still curing. On impulse I knelt down and wrote "Merp!" and added a smiley face in the wet cement. Last time I looked (1993) it was still there. I'm curious if it's still there today. The address is 222 Municipal Drive, Richardson, Texas. The company is long gone now, but the building is still there (at least on Google Streetview). The cement in question was about halfway between the main doors facing South and the SW corner of the building if someone wants to go look. :)
I could day "How are you?" but since I don't actually want to know I'll just say "Merp".