surf and turf

(N) A turd so big that it stretches from down in the toilet hole to above the waterline, sitting on the shore.

Dude, hand me a plunger because I pinched a surf and turf.

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Tethered Grimble

n. The small clump of poop mixed with toilet paper that clings to an ass-hair. Very similar to a dingleberry

If you use inferior toilet paper and no water when wiping, you will end up with tethered grimbles...

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