Michael

Often pretends to be disabled to get attention or into bed with men and/or authority figures. Addicted to candy and porn...sometimes together. Steals books from the church library and takes money from the homeless. He will do anything to get ahead including auctioning off his virginity on ebay. He likes to show off his food slicing skills to (unsuccessfully) compensate for his tiny manhood.

Another word for a compulsive liar, foot fungus brought on by an STD, cheater, male prostitute, and child rapist. "I'm sorry I cheated, but what do you expect, I am a Michael!"

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