Balrog's Whip

A situation in which one appears to have narrowly escaped disaster, only to suffer a fatal blow at the last moment. Refer's to the weapon of Durin's Bane who, after falling into the chasm below Khazad-dûm, lashed out its whip and caught Gandalf by the heel.

1

"Dude, why'd you two break up? I thought you were fine."
"The Balrog's whip."
"Huh?"
"I asked if she was okay, and she was like, ' yeah – I just think it's funny how...'"

2 I stared into the bowl, my turd swirling into the abyss. But, at the last moment, the Balrog's Whip struck, and its girth jammed in the waste pipe. In the hall, someone waited for their turn, ignorant of this dreadful news.

A.W.F.U.L.

Americans Who Figuratively Use 'Literally'.

"Don't you find YouTube comment sections are just so full of god-A.W.F.U.L. losers?"

The Urban Tragedy

The tragedy by which the online resource "The Urban Dictionary" is no longer a useful encyclopaedia of colloquialisms, but rather an adulterated website that acts as a platform for memes, jokes and trends, rather than providing any actual definitions that may be used in daily life.

"Hey dude, what does 'SMH' mean? I tried to look it up on Urban Dictionary but I couldn't find anything useful."
"That's the Urban Tragedy for you, man."

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Scratching your arse and smelling your fingers

British • Verb Phrase
Intentionally doing something you know will cause you pain or emotional discomfort, just in order to feel something.

Person 1: This tastes absolutely disgusting.
Person 2: Why are you still eating it?

Person 1: ... I'm not really sure.
Person 2: You're just scratching your arse and smelling your fingers then, aren't you?