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Random
Killing time by clicking through unknown friend's of your known friends on Facebook. Usually followed by five to ten minutes of friend surfing through complete strangers.
Damn, Toby knows some strange people. (click) This chick is hot, how did he meet her I wonder? (click) Look at this fucking hipster! Too bad Facebook blocks their info...
Friend surfing!!
5π 1π
Pretending that you have food poisoning to get out of work or onerous duties.
Brad: Why didn't John get up to come fishing with us this morning?
Brenda: Dude said his stomach hurt, that maybe he had some bad tuna yesterday.
Brad: Sounds like a case of shamonella to me.
4π 2π
When PMS reaches a critical fission point resulting in a total emotional meltdown of the PMSer and a poisoning of their surroundings so bad that any cohabitators must immediately flee the scene.
Chris: Hey Tom, could you let me in to the office? I left my keycard home.
Tom: That's not like you. What happened?
Chris: Oh the wife went hormonal chernobyl this morning and I skedaddled without cellphone, card, and lunch.
Tom: That's tough man. Spot you for lunch?
Chris: Dude, much appreciated.
Tom: Bros before hos man.
6π 1π
A person too lazy to get off their ass and go see colleagues in the same office or building, who contacts them instead by cellphone.
At the watercooler....
Jon: Hey Sally, how's things?
Sally: Not bad. Got any weekend plans?
Jon: Well, I was thinking (phone vibrates) sorry, gotta check this. Hello? (looks around, sighs) I'll get one.
Sally: Who was that?
Jon: Bob. He wanted a cup of water.
Sally: But he is sitting right over there! What a cell potato...
Jon: What's a 'cell potato?'
Sally: Ever heard of Urban Dictionary?
A skewed idea of fashion mostly seen in women where trashy or overly revealing clothes are considered chic.
Anne: How does this leopard skin shirt look on me? I cut it off below the boobs to show my belly. Pretty sexy with this jean skirt?
Lisa: Honey, you have some trashon sense.
n. A person who tries to hard to make friends and instead scares people off. Also, an annoying or socially clueless person desperately trying and failing to be liked.
Don''t invite Mary to the party! She's a real friend finder - I spent half the night trying to shake her at the last one.
3π 6π
Deliberately choosing songs to sing at karaoke for which you have neither the voice range or tone, and taking a perverse pleasure as you struggle painfully through it.
Antonym - karaoke sadism
Gina: I don't know why Lisa keeps choosing those high pitched songs. She doesn't have the voice for it at all.
Tom: Maybe she's into karaoke masochism.
4π 1π