fake brake

an involuntary reflex to apply a nonexistent brake petal when riding as a passenger in a car.

Sarah is such a bad driver, I was hitting my fake brake the whole way here.

trifecta sick

Sick to the point of having diarrhea, vomiting and a fever

I got the flu BAD this year, I was trifecta sick.

there is no God

What one says upon discovering something truly, unimaginably awful, so awful, in fact, that it causes one to cast aside the remaining shreds of belief one clung to for years that there is any meaningful order to the universe, much less an intelligent designer of said universe

Guy #1: "Did you hear Sherri Shepherd's getting her own sitcom on Lifetime?"

Guy #2: "There is no God."

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