this dude is actually fucking a dead body

Holy shit what the fuck why would he do this

Brian: “this dude is actually fucking a dead body”
Jake: “what the hell why would he do something as horrible as that?”
Brian: “he said no homo tho”
Jake: “oh ok it’s fine then”

9lockknine

9lockknine is a rapper from Florida

Jonathan: “did you hear that 9lockknine is a Florida man?”
Jake: “no, what the fuck, is he going to kill my dog with a fish at Wendy’s?”
Jonathan: “you might have punctuated that incorrectly.”

amongusly

You’re acting sus, amongusly bro, amongusly

Amongusly

31👍 1👎

Last Words

The words someone says before they die

Bill: “Son, I will tell you my last words before I die-“
Billy: “What Dad?”
Bill: “Tell my- tell my- tell my- tell my- tell my P. O. I said fuck ‘em Bitch, I’m fresh off of papers STL only got the Blues, so I fuck with the lakers.”

5👍 1👎

gum giving laws

The gum giving laws are the laws on who you can or cannot give gum to. The reasons you cannot give someone a piece of gum are as follows:

If they are named Addison,
If they put a dent in your wall,
If they cried on your pillow,
And if they previously tried to steal your gum

The gum giving laws were created by Pope John XII and are now in effect in every country even Singapore where gum is banned