signing off

A term to describe the act of leaving an area, or agreeing with a project.

Contributor "Loxi" is permanently signing off from the Urban Dictionary today so she can concentrate on delivering her special brand of humor to the unsuspecting spouse, kids, and people in the neighborhood - and to allow other dictionary contributors to have their say.

Long may Urban Dictionary reign!

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salary

Money paid to an employee for regular work performed that is supposed to reflect the true value of the employee to the company, but more often resembles a bad joke.

My salary is laughable.

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sermon

A boring-like speech given for an extended period of time by a so-called expert in his field for the sole purpose of teaching the audience a subject or valuable lesson.

Sermons are often delivered to the audience by total hypocrites, so please tread with caution.

Examples include:

1. Church sermons by a priest/pastor/preacher

2. Commencement addresses at graduation ceremonies

3. Parents to their children whenever they do something the parents used to do that they now feel is wrong

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Yankton

A small town in southeast South Dakota whose claim to fame includes the following:

1. Home to Tom Brokaw, former anchor of the NBC Nightly News.

2. Football player Lyle Alzado attended Yankton College there.

3. Convicted murder of Wild Bill Hickok, Jack McCall, is buried there.

Employee: You live in Yankton?

Co-worker: (Smiling) Yep!

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afrabnormality

Refers to an African American participating in an activity outside of his normal environment (or what "society" feels is his normal environment).

Examples include:

1. Michael Steele, Republican Party Chair

2. Willy T. Ribbs or Bill Lester, NASCAR drivers

3. Willie O'Ree, NHL player

4. Andre Horton or Suki Horton, Alpine skiers

Girl #1: Did you see Michael Steele on the Today show yesterday spouting his Republican drivel?

Sister #2: Nah. I try to keep afrabnormality like that at a distance.

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inheritance

Money and personal property that a hard-working person accumulates during his lifetime that pissant children thinks is their due upon his death.

Below are categories of heir behavior in regard to future inheritances:

1. Grave Watchers: Children who know they will inherit and are just waiting around for the person to die to claim the inheritance.

2. Ingratiating little bastards: Children who kiss the person's ass repeatedly in the hope he will leave his worldly belongings to them.

3. Presumptive brats: Children who assume they will inherit and who foolishly spend money they don't have today, only to find out later they didn't inherit and are now up to their eyeballs in debt.

Inheritances are a gift, not a birthright.

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sibling

A child born of your mother's womb who is used as a unit of comparison in the family.

Mom: (Chiding) "Your brother sent me flowers for my birthday. Why can't you be more like him?"

Steve: "Ah, Mom! Can I help it if my sibling has more money to waste than me?"

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