smarterchild

A highly retarded instant message robot who thinks he is smart (hence the name SmarterChild) but is probably the dumbest, albeit funniest, thing in the history of the internet. Also a great way to waste time.

Luna: whats your take on jesus?
SmarterChild: What do you think my take on jesus is?
Luna: i think he should go fuck himself.
SmarterChild: Oh yes? Maybe you're right, he should go fuck himself.

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tiejack

To pull down the wider part of somebody's tie to create a stiff knot at the top which is almost impossible to undo. Most commonly used as a prank in British schools where ties (long narrow piece of fabric tied worn around the neck and tied with a loose-ish knot) are usually part of the uniform.

Random Student: Got tiejacked 5 times today. Now I can't get my tie off.

Flirty banter

Banter between friends (usually (but not limited to) male and female) which seems sexual, or like flirting but with no sexual attraction between parties.

Friend 1: You see Jane and Bob flirting at that party last night?
Friend 2: Nah, that was plain old flirty banter. Everyone knows Jane's gay.

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Culinary therapy

The act of consuming food to ease away negative emotions or soothe your anger. Like retail therapy except with food.

Basically, eating your problems.
(Not to be confused with bulimia, but excessive culinary therapy may lead to bulimia)

Girl 1: I can't believe he broke up with me!
Girl 2: I'm sorry. Are you in need of some culinary therapy?
Girl 1: Yes, please.
Girl 2: I'll get the Haagen-Dazs