Clard-on

1. A female equivalent of a ‘Hard-on’ involving engorgement of the clitoris
2. a Clitoral hard-on
3. increased blood flow in the dorsal artery of the clitoris related to a sexual stimulation or excitement
4. A means of expressing sexual interest by a female
5. A male’s insult to another male indicating insufficient masculinity or douche-baggery
6. the result of a female’s accidental ingestion of viagra

“Carmelo Anthony’s 40 points last night gave me a total clard-on!”

"Jenny, I can't go up to write on the black board because I have a clard-on right now."

"Kanye was such a clard-on at the VMAs."

"Just rub your clard-on until it goes away, Bruce, you f'in' pussy."