lincoln log

No, No, No! You're all wrong. A Lincoln Log is when you drop a loaf that's so big and solid that it by itself (without any t.p.) can plug the toilet. if the toilet doesnt plug then it's not a Lincoln Log. Officially it has to be one of those high pressure flushing public bathroom toilets for it to be a real Lincoln Log. You know, those toilets that flush with the sound of a jet taking off. Ever since my good friend Big Head Ed introduced eating regular fiber in his diet nobody has been able to create real Lincoln Logs, so out of traditional honour the standard has dropped to any type of toilet. And please people, lets capitalize the words Lincoln Log. Show some respect for its glory!

Mike: "AH! Yuck, somebody passed a smelly ol' Lincoln Log in this public washroom!"
Albert: "I kind of like that smell"
Other person in the washroom: "That's gross!"

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stutter

What you should do lots of when you're prank phone calling someone. I like to do it while pranking Matt&Renee.

Mike: "Hello, you have won a PS2"
Matt: "Sweet! Renee I won a PS2!"
Mike: "J-j-j-j-j J-j-j-just k-k-k-kid-d-d-ding. F-f-f-f-fag."

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fort mac hack

To expel air and bitumen from the lungs suddenly and noisily, often to keep the respiratory passages free of irritating material.

Tammy: Oorf! Horf! Aorfff!
Roddy: Is she dieing?
Abe: No, that's just the Fort Mac Hack.
Tammy: My breath registers at 87 octane.

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Cabbie Sex

When 2 or more Cab Drivers pull up next to eachother in a parking lot. This event usually takes place at night or early morning. They pull up beside eachother in opposate directions so they can talk. This is called Cabbie Sex. Remember when you were a little kid and youd see 2 dragon flys having sex? you would try to hit them or make them stop? this is the same for Cabbie Sex. your natural urge is to get it to stop.

Doug: Look, those 2 cabbies are having cabbie sex.
Mike: Lets throw this left over chinese food at their cabs to break up the Cabbie Sex.
Doug: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Mike: man, youre a noob, just say LOL.
Doug: sorry, LOL.

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