Substitute Teacher

The act of sitting on one's non-dominant hand for 20 minutes or until it is numb, then using that hand to beat off or give someone a hand job. Similar to The Stranger, but using the non-dominant hand (i.e. left hand if you are right-handed and vice versa).

I'm a little sick, but it's nothing that a beer and
a quick substitute teacher can't fix.

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saddleface

A man who lies underneath a kneeling woman to perform cunnilingus

Old saddleface kept me in bed all morning.