Doing a Morrison

A range of tactics for dodging your responsibilities, including (but not limited to): going missing when the going gets tough; passing the buck; and talking your way out of a tight spot with an empty promise.

Australian slang. Inspired by Australia’s 30th Prime Minister Scott Morrison.

(NOTE: ‘Doing a Morrison’ is not to be confused with ‘Getting Morrisoned’, which usually involves you losing either your pre-selection (see Michael Towke), your job (see Christine Holgate), or your credit for a job well done (see nearly everyone else).)

Crew member 1: “The ship’s taking on water. We’re sinking. Where the bloody hell’s the captain?”
Crew member 2: “Oh, he’s already done a Morrison and racked off in a lifeboat.”

Barry: “How did you get your creditors off your back.”
Bruce: “Too easy. I told them the, ah, cheque was in the mail. Did a total Morrison.”

Delia: “Did you eat the last Tim Tam?”
Nev (wiping chocolate from his lips): “No. It must have been… the other guy.”
Delia: “What other guy? You’re doing a Morrison, aren’t you?”

“Yeah mate, it was piss easy, I just did a Morrison. Promised I’d always love her and she believed it and gave me the money.”

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