heady surprise

A heady surprise is the act of being woken from a dead sleep to find a towel on you and a creep jerking off on you, and telling you to go back to sleep he will be finished soon.

Hey Paul poor Mike didnt get any sleep last night he was awoken to a Heady surprise.

peter turtle

A Peter Turtle is the act of being so lonely that you have no choice but to sit home watch netflix and masterbate using your own tears as lubercation.

Hey Dale did you see that guy at lunch, poor fella he seems like a real Peter turtle.

burgler blast

The act of breaking into someone's home while the occupants are asleep, then masterbating on them. Once finished quietly leave.

Hey Dave I saw that girl from the gas station yesterday followed her home and gave her a burgler blast