syn. buddy jesus
1. Originally from the Kevin Smith movie "Dogma". In the film, Cardinal Glick, during his "Catholicism WOW!" campaign to move the church towards a younger, "hipper" demographic, suggest replacing the crucifix with a new image of Christ. This version is grinning like an infomercial host, with one hand thumbs up and one hand doing a phony Hollywood "Bang-bang" gesture. Imagine Jesus if he were subject to Neilsen ratings.
2. Anyone who possesses all the false charm and lack of genuine quality as personified by the icon represented in definition 1; for example, that phony cockbite where you work. It helps if they walk around all the time acting like only THEY can save you/the corporation/Earth/Jimmy Olsen. Martyrdom: It's a good gig if you can get it.
1. I laughed so hard the first time I saw Buddy Christ I passed an entire chef salad through my nose!
2. That dude... he's such a Buddy Christ... I oughta nail him to something.
Source: Madmann, Oregon
272π 53π
1. The plant Cannabis Ruderalis, which has far less THC content than its' cousins Cannabis Sativa (brown bud) and Cannabis Indica (green bud). Grows wild throughout the Midwest.
2. Any weed that fails to get the smoker high.
"Hey Buddy... that weed you sold me was Nebraska No-High!"
<gunfire>
36π 15π
A word for weed used by people who can't spell worth a shit. From the latin names for the plants Cannabis Sativa and Cannabis Indica. A third Cannabis plant, Cannabis Ruderalis, is also known as Nebraska No-High for it's comparative lack of THC.
"Man, I need some cannibus!"
"What's that, a dope-powered motor coach? It's Cannabis, you illiterate bunghole!"
282π 105π
Karaoke Jockey. While still qualifying as a genuine knob jockey, this is the man who actually accepts money to hear "Paradise By The Dashboard Light" and "Crazy" belted out by drunk American Idol wannabes. Job requires minimal vocal talent, lame sense of humor and the ability to run electronic equipment while suffering alcohol poisoning.
Let's leave this bar, that KJ blows goats.
29π 40π
1. The lead nurse working on a shift.
2. The nurse with the dirtiest knees. Much more valuable and rare than definition 1.
1. The head nurse is coming to remove your catheter.
2. The head nurse relieved me of some pressure in my groin.
78π 14π
Some people mistakenly believe this is a term for those over 18. Fraid not. Some people are born grown-ups, and some die at 100 never having acheived this status. If you are one, congratulations on not dying thus far; if not, here's some things you have to look forward to!
Γ’ΒΒ’ You will cease to be impressed with your 1337speak, pwning people, your h4x0r rep and otherwise talking "liek u r" an illiterate moron. Intelligence, it's not just for breakfast anymore.
Γ’ΒΒ’ For you emo kids, the world will get brighter for you when you stop crying and get another piece of ass. Life's cyclical in nature, roll with it.
Γ’ΒΒ’ You will finally understand why your dad always screams when you begin to pay all your own bills. TIP: Pay electricity bill before buying the new GTA.
Γ’ΒΒ’ Realizing that just because you CAN drink doesn't necessarily make it a good idea. Go out Wednesday, your place of employment might look like the jaws of Hell Thursday morning at 7:00 AM.
Γ’ΒΒ’ Realizing that your place of employment ALWAYS looks like the jaws of Hell, shrugging and doing what you damn well feel like anyway.
and finally,
Γ’ΒΒ’ The moment when you are truly no longer a kid, because you can't be. Because you have decided that all kids, without exception, SUCK. Because now YOU have a kid, crying, yelling, wetting the bed, wanting money. Karma's a cruel bitch.
Other than that, it's the only way to be... what else ya gonna do, be a 40 year old skateboarder?
I'm glad I'm a grown-up
or
(Closed captioning for the 1337 impaired)
i r liek ben a grown-up. it's teh w00t.
167π 69π
1. Originally from the Kevin Smith movie "Dogma". In the film, Cardinal Glick, during his "Catholicism WOW!" campaign to move the church towards a younger, "hipper" demographic, suggest replacing the crucifix with a new image of Christ. This version is grinning like an infomercial host, with one hand thumbs up and one hand doing a phony Hollywood "Bang-bang" gesture. Imagine Jesus if he were subject to Neilsen ratings.
2. Anyone who possesses all the false charm and lack of genuine quality as personified by the icon represented in definition 1; for example, that phony cockbite where you work. It helps if they walk around all the time acting like only THEY can save you/the corporation/Earth/Jimmy Olsen. Martyrdom: It's a good gig if you can get it.
1. I laughed so hard the first time I saw Buddy Jesus I passed an entire chef salad through my nose!
2. That Dan... he's such a Buddy Jesus... I oughta nail him to something.
255π 45π