nu metal

In short, this is the Michelob Light of metal music. I wouldn't even go so far as to call it actual 'metal', but for the sake of avoiding confusion (and so I don't have to come up with a made-up definition on the spot, since I'm being a lazy jackass at the moment), we'll call it Metal Lite. Usually, nu metal songs are not very complicated in riff structure or lyrics; the riffs are often just a few strummed chords, shouted/yelled lyrics, some more strummed chords, an 'emotional' interlude, and more half-assed playing by guys who sound like they're learning as they go along. Seeking depth in Metal Lite lyrics is sort of pointless; you may as well peruse mattress tags for a Shakespearean sonnet. Often, the lyrics are of the stale, done to death "I hate mommy/daddy" (or, in some cases, both) variety. Other lyrical areas include the pain over broken relationships, and anti-society rants which read like something a psuedo-angstridden seventh grader wrote in study hall. The "us against them" theme pops up from time to time, most notably in Slipknot. Who are you against, really? Your parents? The hulking brute waiting for you every morning outside school to give you a wedgie, shake you down for your lunch money, and then toss your miserable ass in some fresh mud (and getting your cheap Hot Topic pants all gunked up!!! Oh, the horror!!!)? Metal Lite is often a common fixture on the Ozzfest tour, where bands like Marilyn Manson, Korn, Slipknot, Disturbed, etc. perform. Sometimes they will introduce lesser known bands, but they often play fiddle to the Metal Lite bands, since, I suppose, they feel their audience may react negatively to a band which actually is talented.

Metal Lite Fan 1: "Did you get Slipknot's new release"
Metal Lite Fan 2: "Oh hells yah! It totally kicked my ass! I actually pissed myself when I heard 'Duality'"
(together)"MAGGOTZ RULE!!! nu metal is the way of the future !!!"
A real metal fan: "You little Hot Profit whores. Go listen to Deicide's self-titled debut, Vader's 'De Profundis', Immolation's 'Close to a World Below', Morbid Angel's 'Altars of Madness' or Emperor's 'Anthems to the Welkin at Dusk'. Then we'll talk. Wait, what the hell am I saying? You won't listen to anything that good."

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