Wide on

A female equivalent to a hard-on. When experiencing intense erotic excitement, a lady's vaginal cavity expands to allow entry of penis/fist/vegetable etc. This causes a 'gap' that needs to be filled: a wide on. It is arguable that gay men can also experience an 'anal wide-on', which of course suggests that certain women could experience a 'double wide-on'.

Ooh that Brad Pitt's a real dish. He really gives me a WIDE ON!

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arse-water

A rare and unexplained phenomenon in which a copious jet of clear water is involuntarily ejected from the subject's rectum. Held perhaps to be connected to the 'ARSE-BABY' (see entry).

Q: "Oh my GOD! What just happened to me!! A clear fluid sprayed from my ring!"

A: "Don't worry, that'll just be Arse-water."

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